It has been awhile since I’ve been on this page to write but recently, I have been inclined to share my ah gong’s testimonial. I have hesitating and holding back for months now. I initially had the idea of doing so, but having to relive those memories were tougher than I’ve had imagined. However, God has been prompting me to share my ah gong’s testimonial as victorious (and it in itself has been pretty cool).
Don’t leave the page now, I urge you to read on. This isn’t me trying to be all preachy, but instead an attempt to share a glimpse of who God really is.
I can’t remember exactly how and when God prompted me again to share ah gong’s testimonial but these incidences leading up to today, I believe are not coincidences but indeed encouragements. Having completed all my major submissions for this semester, I was looking for a good book to read, I opened our book cabinet (which I NEVER do) and I saw a book titled ‘Proof of Heaven” by Eben Alexander. His story of how he had a Near Death Experience for all the skeptics out there, you’d have your fair share of objections but that’s for another story now. I found it amazing because the appearance of this book in my household was (kinda) unknown — my mom claimed it isn’t her book and it probably isn’t my dad’s either. Well, the contents of the book solidified and clarified my faith (I might share more after I finish the book, 30 more pages to go~)
Anyway, I was STILL hesitating because: (1) I struggled and (2) I’m just lazy.
(12 April 2019) In my LAST lecture of the semester, before my class test, the prof played this video. Well, what has it to do with all these? On the bus ride to this class, God placed the idea of sharing my ah gong’s testimony in my head yet again.
BUT I STILL PROCRASTINATED, till now. In light of Good Friday and Easter Sunday, I am going to share a story on love.
“10 February 2019: I am prompted to share your testimony but I struggle to get through this…
I clenched the white origami crane that I folded as I approached your bedside. It was you who taught me how to fold paper cranes. Your eyes glazed as they stared into the distance. It was only the previous day when you acknowledged my presence. You responded to me greeting you by calling my name… but not today.
Soon after, the nurses came in to switch off the machine that monitored your heart rate and oxygen levels. The constant beeping made by the machine stopped, silence overwhelmed the room except for the hissing of your oxygen bag. I felt anxious. The beeps were what I clung on to as the signs of you still fighting for your life. Apparently, the doctors decided that the beeps were causing more anxiety because the rapid beeping reporting a low heart rate or low oxygen level would only occur more frequently as time went by. Still, those beeps confirmed that you were still alive.“
A little back story, ah gong was admitted mid 2018 because he was not feeling well. His conditions deteriorated from there. 9 November 2018, my mother sent me a text saying “I am going to hospital. Ah gong like not doing good”, he wanted to get baptised. He sang “Jesus loves me”. He continued to deteriorate. 27 November 2018, the day before ah gong deteriorated to the point where he could speak no longer. The last words he spoke of were:
“Jesus loves me… Please pray for me… Jesus loves all of you. ”
In the book ‘Proof of Heaven’, Eben mentioned the vast love of God that surpasses all earthly understanding. The kind of peace that washes over you, unexplainable by the bounds of human words. His take away from his experience at a glimpse of heaven was that God is love.
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” -John 3:16
I then, truly understood. Just as Jesus is victorious, ah gong’s testimonial is victorious in Christ over physical pain, disease, physical death and everything of this world. Of course we miss ah gong’s physical being on earth but we have hope that one day, we be reunited in heaven! Here is the good news! Because of Jesus’ death on the cross for our sins, because He experienced physical and spiritual death (because sin separates us from God and Jesus had to bear the burden of ALL OUR SINS so that WE did not ever have to experience that and so that WE can have a loving relationship with God), we celebrate His resurrection that proves that HE IS RISEN, He overcame death!
If you’ve read till this point, I want to urge you not to judge/know God based on christians of this world but instead, judge us based on God’s standards because He is perfect and we are made in His image. I also encourage you to personally get to know God for WHO HE IS (and not, who christians are). God is love. I really hope you would encounter love as great as this!! Love that gives you peace, even in death. Just as how ah gong found peace in Jesus’ love, it is my prayer that you too will be blessed with such amazing grace and love. 🙂